stupid wasps

i want to make another confession here, which is that i murder wasps. wasps who aren't hurting anything. wasps who (like everyone else) are beautiful in their own way. wasps who are peacefully chewing up clothespins and my porch to make beautiful papier mache nests in which to raise their little helpless young (see above). and look how cute their little faces are.

the only reason this is weird is that i am the person who catches spiders in the house and puts them outside. after making them a lunch to take with them. spiders are our friend. as, no doubt, you know. i don't know why i feel like giving spiders a break. it's probably a genetic abnormality. women aren't supposed to like bugs or spiders. i look at the spiders, and i can hear them calling in their little squeaky voices: "help me! help me!"



so, obviously there is no consistency in the abyss of the human soul. i might be more likely to give wasps a break if they weren't so stupid. well, look at the size of their brains. and they eat wood, for pete's sake. but what i was referring to is that every year they come and start making those lovely nests in all the corners of the top of my porch. then they start annoying me. when i walk toward the end of the porch, they send out a scout to annoy me ("go annoy her.") the scout buzzes round and round my head and makes me run and scream like a girl.

i took out a highly poisonous solution. and without regard to saving the earth (the earth snorts with contempt every time we talk about saving her), genetic damage to my cats and dog, or my own health, i SPRAY THE LITTLE BUGGERS until they are dead. go figure.